A few years ago, I crowdsourced an entire book, called “The World According to Twitter.” Every night for 100 nights, I tweeted a provocative question; I published the best responses. (Sample question: “Supply the subject line of an email you really, really don’t want to open.” Sample answer, from @pumpkinshirt: “To my former sexual partners, as required by law.”)
But one response changed my life. I asked: “What’s your greatest regret?” And @susanchamplin replied that regret was her only regret. “Wise advice: You made the best decision you could with the information you had at the time.”
I found that idea profoundly liberating. When you’re contemplating your own mistakes and failures, it lets you off the hook. It says, “You did your best, didn’t you? Now quit beating yourself up and be glad you learned something.”
Lately I’ve been thinking: How many other people have life-changing words of advice to share? And wouldn’t “Crowdwise” be a perfect place to publish them?
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And so, dear readers, I invited you to submit the best advice you’ve ever received. Here’s some of what you shared, conveniently categorized.
The first kind of counsel for your consideration: words of wisdom for almost any life situation.
“You’ve never seen a cat skeleton in a tree, have you?” When Alexandra Aulisi’s cat couldn’t get down from a tree, her grandmother reassured her with those words, predicting (correctly) that the cat would come down on his own. “This advice made me realize that, sometimes, you need to shift your perception of a problem to see a solution,” Ms. Aulisi noted.
“Don’t pickle things.” That line, brought to you by reader Sam Singer’s mother, means: If you have something special, use it now. “Serve daily meals on your good china. Wash your hands with the luxurious soap you received as a housewarming gift. Drink that bottle of amazing wine right away. Don’t save things for future use — because who knows what the future looks like?”
“Exercise adds 20 degrees.” For example, “if it’s 28 degrees out and it seems too cold to go running,” Rory Evans wrote, “once you get moving, it’ll feel like it’s 48 degrees. And that, you can handle.”
“Touch it once.” According to Christine H., this household hint involves putting something away the first time you pick it up. That way, “you don’t have to waste energy looking at it (and feeling guilty), or letting it get dusty so you have to clean it before putting it away.”
“Sleep on his side of the bed.” Mattie Scott heard this advice at her husband’s funeral. “It’s truly the best piece of advice I’ve ever gotten,” she notes. “The effect was profoundly comforting, and it greatly lessened the ache of missing his physical presence.”
“Things don’t have to be perfect to be wonderful.” Gail Dekker first heard her friend, a wedding coordinator, offer these words to young couples whose emotions were running high. But it works in all kinds of situations, including Ms. Dekker’s house hunt. “My initial reaction was that there was something wrong with every condo I saw. My friend reminded me: A place didn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful. She was right.”
“Take a breath.” Melissa Fanning heard this from a yoga teacher (“at a corporate retreat about which I remember nothing else”). It wasn’t a yoga instruction; it was a suggestion to pause at stressful moments, to avoid saying or doing something regrettable. “I use this advice every day,” Ms. Fanning wrote. “It has preserved peace, calmed me, and made me appear smarter than I am.”
“You can’t control other people’s actions, but you can control your reaction to them.” Kim Radich uses this advice daily. “For example, when a family member reacted negatively to a situation, I remembered I can’t control their behavior, and I let it roll off my back.”
“Just be a gentleman.” Harry Kelly admits that this advice “may sound corny.” But that guidance came from his mother at a heightened emotional moment: as she dropped him off at college shortly after his father had died. “It means not taking advantage of other people and trying to adhere to your moral values,” he wrote. “Her advice has kept me from doing some bad things and encouraged me to do what is right. Best advice ever.”
Raising children may be the most complicated, unpredictable, difficult job on earth. No wonder, then, that people are so quick to seek — and offer — counsel.
“Teach your children to swing from the trees — not to keep them from falling, but to see that they never hit the sidewalk.” That, of course, is “figurative and not specific,” wrote Caroline Reynolds, “but you can fit it to the situation. The results are very satisfying when they are in their early 20s and using their thinking skills to choose wisely among the paths of life.”
“These are the ten life skills your kids will need.” Karen Rosen received, from her mother-in-law, a list of ten things children should know how to do to be self-sufficient: Say please and thank you, shake hands, swim, ride a bike, do laundry, cook, bank, type, drive, and clean their rooms. “And always smile at your children, so they will remember you that way,” Ms. Rosen adds.
“The greatest gift you can give to your children is your own emotional well-being.” That insight, provided by a couples therapist to Kellen Klein and his wife, “has helped us prioritize carving out time for ourselves (Sunday softball!) and each other (nine-day trip to Europe without the kid!) throughout the craziness of early parenthood, a time in life when it’s easy to lose sight of your own identity.” Mr. Klein has seen their daughter benefit. “She’s picking up on the self-confidence, camaraderie, and mutual respect that these words have encouraged my wife and me to cultivate.”
“If there were a right way to raise a child, everyone would do it the same way.” The co-worker who offered that advice to Kevin Bolduan went on to explain that, “All new parents need to figure out their own way to raise their own kid.” Or, in Mr. Bolduan’s words: “My best parenting advice is to not take parenting advice.”
The workplace involves interaction with other human beings — and, that, of course, can be a minefield. Here are some thoughts from grizzled veterans.
“When you go in to a job interview, have questions ready.” Inevitably, the interviewer asks: “Do you have any questions?” When you do, in fact, have questions, “you show that you’re inquisitive and curious and eager to learn,” noted Gregor Gilliom. “Having been on the interviewer side, I’m amazed by how many people simply say, ‘Not really. I’m good.’ I never hire those candidates.”
“Your job is to make your boss look good.” According to Kim Fitzsimons, “It’s amazing how well this works in guaranteeing a smooth and trusting working relationship.”
“Greet people with their first names. They’re delighted.” That advice came from Gail Steele’s father, “a much loved and deeply respected dentist. I try to practice this wisdom day to day, in my work as an occupational therapist and among my friends and acquaintances.”
“Never accept work where you’re not learning.” Catherine Kunicki, fresh out of art school, heard famed furniture designer Charles Eames on a local radio show, and called in to ask his advice. She wound up following it. “I never got rich, but I loved what I was doing most of the time.”
And finally, a grab bag of wise words that don’t need further explication. If the advice fits, wear it.
“Boyfriends come and boyfriends go, but SAT scores are forever.” — Margot Watson
“When you see a ball on the road, make a full stop. There’s usually a kid running right behind it.” — Paulina Gomez
“A dollar bill is a skosh longer than 6 inches; you’ve always got a small tape measure with you.” — Rory Evans
“In life there are two types of workers: ditch diggers, and those who tell them how to dig the ditch. Decide who you want to be, and do it 100 percent.” —@cooneyd554
“You don’t always have to have the last word with your children.” — Andrew Berkow
“Best advice at a rocky time: Walk slow and drink lots of water.” — Sandra Barnes
“The day of your wedding, have a good breakfast. Chances are, it’s going to get busy.” — David Rosen
“Never trust anyone wearing a lapel pin.” — R. Weintraub
For the next “Crowdwise:” Better Uber-ing! Whether you’re a driver or a passenger in services like Uber and Lyft, you’ve undoubtedly accumulated some great tips, shortcuts, answers, and techniques. What knowledge can you share about the app, the process, and the system to make the whole process better, smarter, more efficient, or more economical? Send your wisdom to firstname.lastname@example.org by May 10, 2019 and we’ll use them in a future feature.B:
白小姐马报资料2018【南】【逢】【雨】【季】，【她】【的】【容】【颜】【让】【人】【为】【之】【挂】【念】，【她】【所】【出】【之】【街】，【公】【子】【秀】【才】【皆】【要】【观】【之】，【他】【也】【不】【例】【外】。 【可】【他】【无】【数】【次】【遇】【见】【她】，【却】【只】【是】【远】【远】【的】【看】【她】，【不】【敢】【靠】【近】。 【新】【结】【的】【好】【友】【常】【常】【以】【此】【调】【侃】：“【月】【姑】【娘】【说】【是】【天】【香】【国】【色】【也】【不】【为】【过】，【你】【小】【子】【还】【真】【是】【眼】【光】【好】…” 【新】【友】【还】【有】【后】【话】，【可】【他】【看】【的】【她】【入】【神】，【自】【然】【听】【不】【到】【后】【话】【是】【什】【么】。 【雨】【停】【天】【晴】，【他】【和】【她】【站】
【将】【里】【面】【的】【药】【剂】【再】【次】【一】【一】【看】【过】，【确】【定】【以】【她】【目】【前】【筑】【基】【七】【层】【的】【实】【力】，【加】【之】【又】【是】【初】【初】【炼】【制】，【只】【能】【炼】【制】【一】【阶】【的】【辟】【谷】【药】【剂】【来】【练】【手】，【此】【种】【药】【剂】【听】【名】【字】【也】【知】【晓】，【便】【是】【跟】【辟】【谷】【丹】【差】【不】【多】【功】【效】【的】【药】【剂】【了】。 【而】【药】【剂】【与】【丹】【药】【一】【样】，【丹】【药】【有】【丹】【毒】，【而】【药】【剂】【自】【然】【也】【有】【药】【毒】【之】【说】。 【丹】【药】【是】【将】【灵】【药】【用】【丹】【火】【配】【合】【手】【决】【炼】【化】，【祛】【除】【其】【他】，【只】【留】【下】【对】【自】【己】【有】
【容】【华】【一】【边】【整】【理】【着】【药】【草】，【一】【边】【插】【话】【道】：“【或】【许】【是】【因】【为】【君】【二】【一】【直】【在】【修】【炼】，【如】【果】【他】【连】【人】【都】【找】【不】【到】，【怎】【么】【下】【手】【呢】。” 【凤】【燎】【还】【在】【喃】【喃】【自】【语】【着】：“【那】【也】【不】【可】【能】【走】【啊】。【这】【种】【人】【的】【话】，【应】【该】【会】【死】【守】【阵】【地】，【直】【到】【对】【方】【出】【现】……”【然】【后】【不】【断】【的】【温】【水】【煮】【青】【蛙】，【直】【到】【这】【只】【青】【蛙】【彻】【底】【被】【煮】【熟】【才】【对】。 【玄】【修】【认】【真】【的】【想】【想】【道】：“【可】【能】【是】【神】【国】【出】【了】【什】【么】白小姐马报资料2018【末】【乞】【天】【他】【一】【直】【想】【不】【明】【白】【这】【个】【刑】【副】【官】【他】【看】【起】【来】【挺】【正】【常】【的】。 【怎】【么】【对】【他】【就】【这】【样】【的】【无】【赖】【行】【径】【呢】？ 【是】【的】，【他】【感】【觉】【到】【这】【个】【刑】【副】【官】【虽】【然】【表】【现】【的】【挺】【轻】【佻】【的】。 【但】【他】【知】【道】【这】【个】【刑】【副】【官】【对】【男】【人】【是】【没】【有】【性】【趣】【的】。 【就】【是】【不】【知】【道】【他】【这】【样】【对】【待】【他】【是】【为】【了】【什】【么】。 【难】【道】【就】【只】【是】【好】【奇】【嘛】。 【觉】【得】【刑】【家】【的】【传】【家】【宝】【一】【直】【往】【他】【身】【上】【贴】【这】【事】【把】【他】【的】
【千】【璃】【这】【才】【松】【了】【一】【气】，【毕】【竟】【她】【们】【刚】【来】【云】【落】【大】【陆】【的】【时】【候】【月】【儿】【就】【不】【见】【了】，【这】【都】【整】【整】【过】【去】【了】【三】【年】【多】，【期】【间】【千】【璃】【也】【找】【过】【但】【是】【没】【有】【找】【见】，【所】【以】【心】【中】【还】【是】【很】【担】【忧】【的】，【现】【在】【听】【见】【月】【儿】【还】【活】【着】，【心】【中】【总】【算】【是】【松】【了】【口】【气】。 “【这】【些】【年】，【你】，【你】【过】【得】【好】【吗】？”【男】【子】【好】【像】【是】【鼓】【足】【了】【勇】【气】【说】【出】【了】【这】【句】【话】。 “【很】【好】，【认】【识】【了】【很】【多】【新】【的】【朋】【友】，【相】【信】【月】
【梁】【洛】【洛】【在】【听】【到】【门】【外】【有】【规】【律】【的】【敲】【击】【声】【时】，【感】【觉】【自】【己】【都】【要】【泪】【流】【满】【面】【了】。 【之】【前】【的】【计】【划】【都】【是】【说】【好】【的】，【这】【密】【室】【开】【启】【的】【暗】【号】【只】【有】【姐】【弟】【二】【人】【知】【晓】。【此】【时】【除】【了】【颜】【翎】【不】【会】【是】【其】【他】【人】。 【当】【暗】【门】【缓】【缓】【开】【启】，【如】【期】【看】【到】【对】【方】【的】【二】【人】【心】【内】【都】【不】【由】【松】【了】【口】【气】。【颜】【翎】【那】【般】【笃】【定】，【但】【终】【归】【是】【放】【在】【自】【己】【眼】【前】【才】【能】【完】【全】【安】【心】。 【少】【女】【的】【行】【事】【从】【来】【都】【是】【无】【所】【顾】【忌】